Indigo Children

[pt_tangles]

In some of the teen message boards I visit, I have been seeing a distressing resurgence in the number of kids who choose to believe that they are 'Indigo Children'.  This whole phenomena bothers me.  It is a scam that people buy into lock, stock and barrel simply because they want to believe that parenting is easy or that their situation in life really is more special than someone else's.

I have read the pages and I have taken the quizes.  If I bought into this line of crap, I could make the claim that I am an Indigo.  I have strong leadership qualities.  I am a dreamer and I am sensitive to other people's moods.  I am also a strong personality and if I had not been raised with manners and boundaries, I could very easily have been the holy terror that Indigo checklists describe.

Parenthood is not easy, people.  Sometimes kids are hard to deal with.  Sometimes they don't want to learn to live in society because being a naked screaming me-me is much more fun.  But just because kids may not want to be a part of society and conform to societal rules is no reason that they should not be equipped to deal with the people around them.  To deny them the knowledge that they need to prosper in modern society is to cripple them for the rest of their lives.

Like it or not we live in places where you have to wait in line sometimes.  Where you can't just take off all your clothes and run naked through the streets whenever you feel like it.  We live in places where you need to have and know some sort of boundaries.  If you cannot operate within those boundaries, how do you ever expect to survive?

The Indigo and Crystal (and now Rainbow) phenomena are frauds.  While everyone may be special in their own way, you are not more evolved or less human than anyone else.  You are going through all the same problems that everyone else has at your age, and you will come through it just like everyone else has.  Being human is not something to be ashamed of.

People use the Indigo thing as a crutch.  It is an excuse to not grow up and deal with real life and it is an excuse to not have to 'be the bad guy' and discipline their kids. The last generation used the excuse of 'wanting to be their kids' friends', this is just the New Age version of lazy parenting.

Real life is hard.  Parenting is hard.  Setting boundaries and living within those boundaries is hard.  It isn't meant to be easy.  It is through the struggle that you come to know yourself, and appreciate the type of person you are.  Everyone is unique.  Everyone thinks that their child is the most special.  That doesn't need to mean that they are anything other than a beautiful person.

If you really want to change the world, live by example.  Be happy and productive and healthy.  People will follow, even if you never see the fruits of your efforts.

--Phae

X-posted to Phae in Space

Comments

[aylwyn27.livejournal.com]

As you might remember, I volunteer an awful lot at my kids' elementary school and I find it really sad just how many parents there are that know they can't control their kids, but choose to just throw their hands up in the air and leave it up to someone else to try and control them. Like you said parenting *is* hard work and it baffles me how these people can just leave what I view as one of the most important jobs I have up to someone else to deal with.

I thought about the questions Lark posed and think it's a bit of everything she touched on. Some parents just don't care while others work so many hours that they have little to no time for their kids. These are the kids that tend to latch on to the teachers and aides in the classrooms or else just cause problems because they don't know how else to get attention. I find it truly sad.

Sorry to get off the Indigo topic. If more people in the 'mainstream' heard it I'm sure they'd take full advantage of using a label for their child rather than address their own shortcomings.

[pt_tangles]

I work in a grocery store. I think I have seen just about every parenting technique that needs to be *avoided at all costs* that there is. One woman has to actually pick her five year old up and carry him away from things because he ignores every word she says to him. That is something that will take a lot of will to fix (something that people who let it get that far don't have to start with).

It both makes me never want to be around children ever again, and strive to be a far better parent to my own future children just so that people can see that it is still possible to raise good kids in modern society.

--Phae