I think that a lot of it is the same problem that people of my parents' generation had (and my own father). They never want to be the 'bad guy'. They never want to have to say no, so they find a reason not to.

But, as has been often said, kids have oodles of friends. They don't need that in their parents. They need guidence and discipline. They need their parents to show them how to grow into productive human beings. It is a big job, and I think that there are far too many people who either are having kids because their friends are (which I have seen a lot of in the community I was raised ... it isn't pretty), or because they want to have someone who will love them unconditionally when they feel that they do not have the love and understanding of their family and friends already (which I think puts unfair pressure on children).

And I think that a lot of it, like you said, is desperate denial of a less than perfect child. Like somehow their kid has to be perfect in every way in order to be worthy of love.

The indigo phenomena is kind of a catch all for both the angsty misunderstood crowd and folks who either really need help parenting or probably shouldn't have been parents in the first place.

--Phae